After having one of those days, where one innocent email at work sent me into a spiral of negative thinking, I tried to start my day with positive thinking. I reminded myself of my successes at work, my ability to do my job well, and my strong work ethic. And then I let go.
I then proceeded to have a huge success at work this morning. In fact, I was feeling so pumped up after my success that I decided that I needed a reward. So I went and bought myself a nice lunch that probably contained enough calories to meet my quota for the whole day, if not two whole days.
And I felt the spiral coming back, this time telling me that because I ate one unhealthy meal, I was likely going to become overweight. And then I would become obese. And then my Husband wouldn't be attracted to me. And my co-workers would judge me. And then I would lose my friends. And my job.
It seems so silly when I type out my thoughts, but it doesn't seem so silly when they are in my head.
I need to do a little cognitive adjustment here.
I had a success at work. It was perhaps not the best idea to reward myself with food, because I am working towards using food in a healthy way to simply nourish my body. But, I generally eat healthy. I generally take care of my body.
Successes and failures are part of life. And I am OK.
I reward myself with new clothes. That's not very healthy either. ;)
ReplyDeleteBut, the nice peaceful walk or jog that is my other option is. :)
Funny how we all have a thing. A thing we do to cope with emotions that is less than healthy. And why is it so easy to turn to that instead of all of our healthy tools we learn? I suppose this is the question addicts ask themselves everyday. Makes the whole addiction thing seem a little less bizarre.
ReplyDelete