So, How Was Your Day?

I'm toying around with an idea, and I'd love to hear others' opinions on it.

Husband and I have a difficult time connecting with each other. Surprise, surprise, right? But it's not just because of addiction. That's actually the only topic we can really have a genuine conversation about, other than conversations about our child (and thank the good Lord that we agree on parenting).

The rest of the stuff is hard. We will get excited about spending some quality time together, but then we don't really know what to do with ourselves. We have the "How was your day?" conversation, and then we talk about surface topics like the weather and our schedules. And then we're done. And I think it's as much of my problem with communication if not more my problem with communication than his. I clam up. I don't share anything. It's a problem we've both had since we've known each other, but these days, it's more of Husband asking me to communicate with him and me shutting down.

It's strange how that happens. I've been told in my professional life that I am an excellent communicator, very comfortable speaking in front of a crowd. But that's easy for me. I can talk for hours about my professional work. Because it isn't personal. It isn't a conversation about feelings. It isn't a conversation that involves vulnerability.

I decided to start reading a book on communication in marriages to help me understand how to communicate. And so far the book is great, but very difficult to absorb and even more difficult to practice. Usually I read when Husband reads his recovery stuff in the evenings, and then I go to bed without sharing anything with him.

So I'm wondering if maybe we should read a book together and talk about it as we read. I wonder if it wouldn't be so easy to shut down if I had some material in front of me to talk about with Husband. And even better if the material has to do with communication. But I've never done anything like this before. I don't know if Husband would be open to this, but based on his requests lately to have more time set aside for the two of us to communicate, he likely would think this is a great idea.

But I don't know. Anyone else read books together as a couple? I don't know why, but it sort of seems cheesy to me. Then again, most of personal communication to me seems cheesy because I'm not very talented in that area (like the formal dialogue we do in therapy, awkward!).

Any opinions?